Some words about life and love

In the silence of being alone in my quiet home after an exciting weekend with fifteen members of my very dear family, I was prompted by an email from a friend to send these words to all of you. These are mostly things I have heard or thought and tried to apply to my own life while sharing them with others. Know that I am not intending to preach - only to share. You may have read them before, but it makes me feel good to share them.

First: mostly from the Tony Robbins organization:

I have added a few of my own. (-A)

ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.

TWO-A. Marry a man/woman with a pleasant voice so you will always want to listen and hear them when they speak.

THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.

FOUR. When you say, "I love you," mean it.

FIVE. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye.

SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight.

EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dream. People who don't have dreams don't have much.

NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.

TEN. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives.

TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.

THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"

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FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

FOURTEEN-A. Know that loving involves risk of great pain at the loss of a loved one, but the marvelous joys of loving far exceed the inevitable pain of loss.

FIFTEEN. Say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze.

SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.

SIXTEEN-A. When you win be humble and respectful of those who did not.

SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others, and Responsibility for all your actions.

EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

EIGHTEEN-A. Remember, it is far better to lose an argument than a friend.

NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

TWENTY-ONE. Spend some time alone.

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And from another, unknown source:

Work like you don't need the money.
Love like you've never been hurt.
Dance like nobody's watching.
Sing like nobody's listening.
Live like it's Heaven on Earth.

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AN IRISH FRIENDSHIP WISH:

May there always be work for your hands to do;
May your purse always hold a coin or two;
May the sun always shine on your windowpane;
May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain;
May the hand of a friend always be near you;
May God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.

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From another very dear friend:

The best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch and swing with, never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you've ever had.

It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives.

Giving someone all your love is never an assurance that they'll love you back! Don't expect love in return; just wait for it to grow in their heart but if it doesn't, be content it grew in yours. It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone, an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone, but it takes a lifetime to forget someone.

Don't go for looks; they can deceive. Don't go for wealth; even that fades away. Go for someone who makes you smile because it takes only a smile to make a dark day seem bright. Find the one that makes your heart smile.

May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human, enough hope to make you happy and enough talent to make others happy..

Always put yourself in others' shoes. If you feel that it hurts you, it probably hurts the other person, too.

The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.

Happiness lies for those who cry, those who hurt, those who have searched, and those who have tried, for only they can appreciate the importance of people who have touched their lives.

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Tears, like laughter are usually a part of love. Each can be the result of a wide range of thoughts and feelings. There can be sadness or joy in either as well as many feelings in between. Remember, both tears and laughter can be quite contagious.

When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life so that when you die, you're the one who is smiling and everyone around you is crying.

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A few quotes:

Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person; having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but to pour them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, knowing that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then, with the breath of kindness, blow the rest away.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - George Elliott

It’s wonderful to have someone who really understands . . .
someone who gives the tenderness your heart sorely demands . . .
someone to tell your troubles to when evening lights are low . . .
who with a smile can drive away the dreary clouds of woe . . .
understanding is a treasure gold can never buy . . .
for it has a magic power to lift the spirit high . . .
those who proceed without it lose out at every turn . . .
like souls adrift upon life’s sea they will ever yearn . . .
so if you have someone, love them with all your heart . . .
for understanding people are few and far apart!

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Smiley Blanton

Beauty of face and body attracts only; it cannot hold, nor will it last for long. Beauty of heart, on the other hand, grows with time, holds people together, and brings joy to all who have the good fortune to share it. Ah! But beauty of soul, the greatest of all, makes life worth living for everyone touched by it, whether for a brief moment or a lifetime.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - HJ - 1974

It is surely not within our power to say how long our love will last.
It may be within this hour may lose those joys we now do taste.
The blessed that immortal be, from change in love are only free.
Then since we mortal lovers are, ask not how long our love will last,
But while it does, let us take care each minute be with pleasure passed:
Were it not madness to deny to live because we’re sure to die?

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Unknown

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A final word from this writer:

LOVE - IMPRESSIONS

Love is a passion of the heart, the soul and the body. When new it quickens the heartbeat, excites the soul and stimulates one physically and mentally. It brings about intense desire to be with the one loved, great joy when together, intense longing when apart. There is no antidote without mental anguish, no relief without deep sense of loss, no cessation without intense pain. Even when not returned in kind it causes one to smile constantly and weep tears of pure joy until surely and finally it fades away. It is a powerful and motivating force for good when well directed. As the years pass, its burning intensity is gradually replaced by deep feelings of comfort and warmth of the soul and heart. It gets better and better, only ending in the final, tragic parting that brings such terrible pain. For these reasons, love is not the domain of cowards for it takes genuine bravery to risk it. Such is love and the price we must someday pay for loving, even until that final moment, pain. Fear of that pain cannot stop this one from loving deeply and sincerely once more - even at an advanced age.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Howard Johnson, at age seventy-eight.